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Sunday, July 24, 2011

Cornerstones of Success

Remember the experiment that you did in the first or second grade? You take two plants and put them in a closet. One gets water and one doesn’t. You put two other plants on a windowsill in the sunlight. One gets water and one doesn’t. The only plant that survives will be the one that gets everything it needs: water and sunshine. Just water doesn’t cut it. Just sunshine doesn’t cut it. And of course, as every gardener knows, if you really want a healthy plant, you need to add the right amount of nutrients.
It is the same with the naked divorce – all 7 components work in tandem, supported by the naked divorce cocoon.


Component #1: The naked divorce cocoon – the backbone of the program

For the 21 day program, you need to build a support structure around you I call the naked divorce cocoon. Much like a caterpillar who has to be encased within a cocoon before it can transform into a butterfly, human beings need to have a structure to contain them before they can transform themselves.
The naked divorce cocoon is your rock, your foundation and support to return to whenever you feel life is getting on top of you. No matter what happens, you can return to the 7 aspects of the naked divorce cocoon which will help you feel safe and grounded once more.


Component #2: Managing your health, diet and hormones

The second component will support you in your healing work by ensuring you eliminate foods and drink which aggravate your hormones, interrupt your sleep patterns or interfere with your ability to concentrate. With the correct habits in place, your emotional highs and lows will normalize, your stress levels will decline and healing will be ethical and healthy for you.


Component #3: Harness your emotions in a positive way

People often avoid feeling their emotions by keeping busy or numbing them with alcohol or S.T.E.A.T.s. This is largely because inherently human beings fear emotions and are unsure of what to do with them. For most of us, we don’t understand our emotions, how they work, how to tame them or what we can learn from them. Additionally with the dawning of ‘Emotional Intelligence’ concepts in the workplace, we are encouraged to keep our emotions under wraps, be calm, peaceful and intellectualise them away.
Ignoring our emotions can lead to destructive and entropic disintegraton hence why it is curious to note that since the dawning of the ‘Emotional Intelligence’ age, the worldwide divorce rates have increased.
When there is healing to be done, emotions are our greatest teachers and if harnessed, emotions can carve out powerful new ways of being. Within the naked divorce, there is a structured process for how to listen to your emotions, work with them as partners and harness their power as a catalyst for transformation. Thy key is to keep your heart open whilst feeling your emotions and I will show you how to do that. Learning the techniques of working with your emotions can transform your life in many beneficial ways.


Component #4: Stay focused at work

It’s key to remain focused on your work and keep your head in the game. There are several techniques to follow to ensure that you have high energy and focus at work whilst at the same time you are being authentic in the processing of your emotions.


Component #5: Set yourself up for success

Maintaining a civil and courteous relationship with your ex is critical to the success of your divorce, especially if you have children. This component will give you some clear tips on ex etiquette whether or not you have children. Additionally there are also many ideas on how to support your children through your divorce.


Component #6: The naked divorce buddy

Every successful athlete has a coach, a buddy who is rooting for them from the sidelines. It is very tempting to burden your friends with your divorce troubles but as you will see within this section, those closest to you are often a hindrance to your healing without even knowing it. Bless them, they try their damndest but often because they love you, they will let you off the hook. What you really need is someone who will hold you accountable. Someone who will hold your hand and kick your butt if required. You will have an opportunity to choose your naked divorce buddy carefully.


Component #7: Commit to the structure of the program

It does not matter if it takes you 21 days or 21 months to complete the program, the most important point is do not skip any steps. There is an intended structure for following the naked divorce and skipping steps is you simply doing the program your own way. There is nothing wrong with doing that, but then do not expect the breakthrough results. For a complete transformation of your life and breakthrough results, I request you follow the structure of the program.

For some of you, this will mean surrendering to the structure of the program!

Failing to plan is planning to fail. It’s critical to plan for the naked divorce and ensure you have adequately prepared for the 21 days of work ahead of you. Clear your schedule, ensure you have the items on the shopping list and logistics list, clear your weekends. This component covers the preparation for the program so you ensure your success. Treat yourself like an athlete on this program, ensuring you have everything you need to guarantee success.

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